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infatuation by ~Astranomical:iconAstranomical:

Categories Literature > Poetry > General Poetry > Open


and how do you feel about this?

the same way i feel about gravity. the way that inevitably, something will occur. that even though i've spent many long nights trying to teach myself to levitate, my feet always find their way securely to the ground. that maybe it's silly to be so scared of falling, because you can only pretend to be a bird for so long before you hit the ground.

shouldn't you plan out your fall, and save yourself from some broken bones?

nothing ever ends well, so there's no point in prolonging the damage. i either break my legs or forget how to use them and i end up fucked over. maybe i'm done planning my own demise. i just want to lay in the streets without worrying about the coming cars. i want to watch the stars move, and wait until one of them falls into the palm of my hand.
©2009 ~Astranomical
:iconastranomical:

Author's Comments

i feel weird about the length and this isn't edited at all -- i literally wrote it for the first time in the "Add Text" box.

but.. it's been a while. i miss writing.

Comments


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:iconcackleberry:
=Cackleberry Jul 14, 2009, 1:14:25 AM
You write really well. This is great, I love it :love:

--
"Ravek, my Elspethlove..." - Ashling :heart:
:iconastranomical:
~Astranomical Jul 14, 2009, 1:34:06 AM
thank you so much (: i'm glad that you liked it! :heart:

--
:earth::peace:

--------

If something is uncomfortable to think about, it probably means that you should think about it.
:iconcanibehero:
~CanIBeHero Jul 14, 2009, 8:21:05 AM
I rather love this.
It does sounds like infatuation and love. A sweet little way to put it, though. :)
:iconastranomical:
~Astranomical Jul 14, 2009, 9:17:42 AM
i'm glad that you like it (:
this is kind of about that, yeah. well, i don't know what else it would be about and that's what i was writing it about. i just really like the word infatuation, which is why it ended up as the title x]

--
:earth::peace:

--------

If something is uncomfortable to think about, it probably means that you should think about it.
:iconcanibehero:
~CanIBeHero Jul 14, 2009, 12:54:38 PM
The second half could use some editing, but everything until the part about the stars is gold. The description of floating, the analogy of breaking your legs or forgetting how to use them, it's all very poignant and does ring true to life. I guess I'd just edit the second half a little. Other than that, it's pretty good work.
:iconastranomical:
~Astranomical Jul 15, 2009, 9:42:54 AM
i agree. the first half was better and less forced.. once i finished all of those pieces i was just kind of bored and kept writing because i wanted to, but not because i had anything to say. so yeah, that part was random and not really continuous or... that good, haha. i changed it, do you think it's better now?

--
:earth::peace:

--------

If something is uncomfortable to think about, it probably means that you should think about it.
:iconcanibehero:
~CanIBeHero Jul 15, 2009, 9:44:44 AM
Ohhh, yes. Much better. I like this one very much. :)
:iconastranomical:
~Astranomical Jul 15, 2009, 11:12:52 AM
awesome!

--
:earth::peace:

--------

If something is uncomfortable to think about, it probably means that you should think about it.
:iconhogwartsdweller:
~hogwartsdweller Jul 18, 2009, 11:33:54 PM
love the last two lines dude.
i feel ya

--
introspection yields messy results
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